His services were last night and today at Holy Trinity Church (where his Mom and Dad were married, Mom and Melissa were buried from Trinity and Nick and Mere were married there.)
There were Naval Officers and a Naval Bugler at the Cemetery...Dad would have loved it.
This was my Eulogy...my TRIBUTE TO MY DAD:
How do you put
into words 88 years of a life well lived?
It’s not easy.
Dad was born May
31, 1930 (Actually, I found a small card that has Dad's footprint on it - when he was born. There was a handwritten notation on the card that said "This child was born after midnight. So maybe his birthday was June 1, but it was May 31 on his official Birth Certificate!) to Clarence & Mildred Rotert. He had three older siblings Ethel, Anna Mae
& Benny, all teenagers..and they spoiled him rotten. They must have told him he was right all the
time, because that stayed with him all his life.
He grew up in
East Dayton (right around the corner on E. Fourth St.) and made lifelong
friends there. Bob Walters, Jim Walker
(who he joined the Navy with in 1949) Jack Nowling and Dick Mayer. They (and their families)were family to us.
We went on camping trips with them, they had monthly parties for
years. I wish I could tell some of those
stories, but they aren’t stories that were meant for Church! The kids all stay in touch still
Dad went to Holy
Trinity through 8th grade, then Graduated from Parker Co-op in 1948.
He joined the Navy in 1949. He proudly served
on the USS Midway from 1949-1953.
He met mom when
he was stationed in Philadelphia (He went to a dance and had a date with
another girl. Dad asked her to get a
date for his buddy…it was Mom. He was
more interested in Mom, and well, the rest is history!)
They married June
6, 1953 – had four children – Donna, Pam (me) Steve and Sue. (When
Mom introduced Dad to her family – her parents and five brothers – they thought
his name was Robert (ROTERT) and started calling him BOB. So in Philly they were Uncle Bob and Aunt
Re. In Dayton they were Uncle Irvin and
Aunt Mickey.)
We eventually
settled in Beavercreek, where we went to St. Helens. Dad was an usher there for many years, and
served as the Festival Chairman in the late 60s.
Dad taught us the
love of the outdoors – we went camping, boating, and Old River every summer (because
he worked at NCR) We camped out in the
backyard every summer with neighborhood kids.
He taught us how to fish (which I never liked). He taught me the love of sports – he played
softball for NCR, he loved watching the UD Flyers (especially in the 60s) and
Ohio State Football. He also taught me
how to play sports. I am left handed,
but play sports right handed, because that’s how he taught me! Sports are a big part of my life – my
families life to this day.
I had the chance
to tell Dad this last week. I didn’t
want to miss the opportunity to tell him the difference he made in my
life. He said “At least I accomplished
something!”
We had a great
childhood. We had a dog, Dixie, that Dad
took hunting. He was an outdoor dog. Dad built him a doghouse, and made sure
that it had plenty of straw in the winter – sometimes even blankets. But when it got really cold, Dad would let
Dixie inside. But she had to stay in the
kitchen. I remember one night at dinner,
we had peas and carrots. I DID NOT like
peas and carrots. Dad told me I had to
take one bite, and that I would sit there until I did. I told him “Fine. I’ll sit here all night,
I’m not eating them.” When Dad left the room, I held my plate down for
Dixie. Dixie LOVED peas!!! Dad taught me PERSERVERANCE. Everybody won.
When we went
camping, we would unload the boat when we got there. Dad would get in the boat
and hand things out to us. The first
thing he handed us was a lawn chair for mom.
She would sit down with a beer and a cigarette while we set up
camp. I never understood why we had to
do all the work and mom got to sit down…until I was a mom. Then I realized that Mom did all the work
BEFORE we left – laundry, packing, grocery shopping for the trip. I don’t think mom liked camping in the
beginning, and Dad must have promised her that “HE would do everything”. He was pretty smart. He taught me a GOOD WORK ETHIC.
We took our first
trip to Florida the summer of ’74.
Usually on long trips Dad & Mom shared the driving. But this time Dad let me do part of the
driving. I had the leg through Tennessee and the mountains. It was my first experience of driving on the
highway (if you know that part of 75, it’s a pretty scary drive!) Mom kept saying, “She’s driven enough” and
Dad said “She’s fine”. He trusted
me. To this day, I drive that leg of the
trip whenever we drive south!
Mom was the
investor. Dad was the spender . He LOVED to spend money. He got what he wanted – a boat, a camper, a 5th
wheel, a Carry out-the Beer Center. Yep.
They bought a carry-out (I think it had to do with the fact that Dad
loved beer, so he thought he’d be good at selling it). It was another of his “Hair brained Schemes”
as Grandma (his mom) put it.
Dad was the life
of the party. He was a people person. Everybody loved him….and he told me that on
many occasions.
He worked for Raj
Soin at Modern Technologies. Dad said
“He loved me, because he loved politics and he thought I looked like Donald
Rumsfeld”
Which he did.
When they moved
to Florida and he joined the VFW, he became a regular. Like Norm.
In Cheers. Everybody knew Dad’s
name “IRV” everyone would say when he walked into the bar. I talked to them the other day. She said “We loved Irv!” He was right!
He was ALWAYS
right. Well sometimes. Once when he called me, must have been
February, he said “We have one less day this year.” (because it was leap
year) I said “No, Dad. We have one MORE day. It’s leap year.” He argued with me for a minute, and finally I
asked him where he was. The VFW of
course. I said “is there anyone sitting
next to you? Ask them.” When he came back he said “You’re
right”. He didn’t admit that very often.
Got to the point
the last couple of years that I learned to pick my battles. He could be right all the time. It made him happy.
Dad had a great
life. He travelled, he had lots of friends.
Singing made him the happiest. He
loved to sing Karake. And he was good at
it. He started his singing career right
here at Trinity in the choir. I believe
he sang Ave Maria in one of his sister’s weddings.
He and mom
eventually bought a place in Melbourne Florida.
He loved Florida.
There was tragedy
in Dad’s life as well. He lost two
children. Steve (his only son) in 1975
and Sue in 2013. And a granddaughter, our
daughter, Melissa. And a great
grandson. After Sue died, he decided to
stay in Florida permanently. He taught me to HAVE HOPE. (that you can
survive the loss of not ONE child, but two.)
He lived in
assisted living for two years in Florida in a beautiful place on the Indian
River. But he finally decided to move
home to be closer to his family.
He had to adjust
to another home.-Traditions of Beavercreek- And he did – they had Happy Hour
every day, which he didn’t miss very often.
He taught everyone to play rummy – HIS version, HIS rules. They all adapted. Although the woman who was playing with us
made the comment one time “This isn’t how we play rummy in Wisconsin”. Dad never wore his hearing aides (Which
might have been because she and I talked the entire time we played and it drove
Dad crazy) so he never heard her
comments. One time, he slapped his hand on the table and kind of yelled and
said “YOUR TURN”. She looked at me and
said “Did you have to put up with this all your life???”
He loved when his
whole family was around him…we had a family Christmas party at Traditions last
year on December 3…he loved having everyone together. He loved visits from his Grandchildren, great
grandchildren (David, Neveah, Jessie, Andrew & Maxwell Irvin) – and his Friday visits from Nick. He loved that Matthew was living in his house
and taking care of it. He loved when
Jessica and Becky came to visit. Donna
was with him every morning, I was with him every night. He looked forward to those every day visits!
Dad and Melissa
were very close. One night, they were
both at our house (and John too).
Melissa wanted to go to Taggarts (a bar) and wanted us to go. It was 9:00 and too late for us…but NOT
Dad! He went with them and their
friends. I have a video she took. Some day I’ll post that. He had a great time with her.
Family was
important to Dad – he was very close to his nieces and nephews-close in age
too-he was more like a cousin than an uncle and enjoyed doing things with them
too.
A couple of
months ago he stopped going to Happy Hour.
And the dining room. He was
running out of gas.
The activities
director told me they missed Dad playing cards – but they were still playing by
IRV’s RULES.
After he passed,
about 10 of his caregivers came to say Goodbye.
There were a lot
of tears. He was right. THEY ALL LOVED HIM. And he loved them. If you got a kiss on your hand you KNEW- I
think most of them did! He taught me to
TREAT OTHERS THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED.
Irvin J, Irv,
Bob…he did it all.
Coach, fisherman,
outdoorsman, athlete
Singer. Jack of
all Trades… And willing to share his birthday with his son-in-law for 45 years…
But most of all,
a great husband, DAD, Grandpa, Great Grandpa, Uncle and Friend.
I didn’t realize
until I sat down and started reminiscing what an impact my Dad made on my
life. I am like him in so many ways.
I miss you
already Dad.
I love you.
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